We're murderers... Twix please

Other people will write meaningful, profound tributes to Eddie Izzard. I just think he's the funniest guy around at the moment. He has the courage to be original and different, and he has the knack of making the surreal seem utterly mainstream. Instead of the meaningful and profound, I have gone for the other extreme, and below have simply listed a few lines - sometimes in groups, sometimes one-liners - which to me sum up what he's all about. They're in no particular order, just how I thought of them. Fans should recognise these and be able to place them (I've tried not to use all the obvious ones). If you're not a fan... what the hell are you looking at this page for anyhow?

If you have any you want me to add, or any comments, please email me... I'd like to make this more representative...

- Death... no cake, I meant cake.
- You said death first.
- But I meant cake.
- Well all right. You're lucky I'm Church of England.

- Beavers do what?

- The goons have found the drilling equipment. Open up Charlie tunnel. We dig round the clock.

- Brian, where's the pollen?

- Holy Ghost, this is not an episode of Scooby Doo.

- Je suis le Président de Burundi.
- ... Je dois partir maintenant parce que ma grand-mère est flambée.

- You sound crap. I have bought a hammer. You may borrow it if you wish.

- Je ne suis pas un putain. Je n'avais pas le sex pour l'argent.

- Salmon, yes. Got a bit of a surprise for you people.

- C'est merde pour le cheval...

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Written by Jon Renyard
Last updated 1 January 2000