To Chapter Twelve To Chapter Fourteen
 
CHAPTER THIRTEEN

in which Wrungel makes short shrift of an anaconda and is once again decently attired


  I shook the ashes onto the floor, put the sparks out with my heel and shoved the pipe back into my pocket. There I sat, as quiet as a mouse, hoping the panic would somehow abate. Then the pilot poked his head in. I felt hopeful: after all he must have been in worse) predicaments he ought to calm them down. Instead, the pilot lost his head himself.
   I saw him blanch, gasp and clutch at some lever or other. There was a bang and then the roar of the engines stopped and all we could hear was the wind whistling outside. There was a plop above us, the salon jerked and then floated smoothly.
   The other passengers were at their wits' ends, but I had already tumbled to it. Today every schoolboy knows about the catapult by means of which the pilot saves himself in an extremity. But in those days it was the latest gadget which was called "Go thee down." In the case of an explosion, fire or some other disaster on board the plane, say if a wing fell away, the pilot pulled the lever, which separated the cabin from the rest of the aircraft, and it was parachuted down. A very useful contraption no doubt, but in our case its application was obviously premature.
   It was pointless to object or argue: the plane had gone on its course, while our cabin was floating slowly down. The smoke had almost dispersed, but the passengers were not in the least reassured. On the contrary, feelings were running very high, and even Fooks felt jerky. Any moment I could expect him to jump up and pull the mackintosh off me. I was the only one to keep my head.
   Of course the flight had been interrupted and the ticket invalidated, but still I did not like the idea of everybody's attention focussing on me, of providing explanations and perhaps even trying to deny the charges of causing the entire unpleasantness. I did not relish the role of the accused and so decided to take advantage of the commotion to pass myself off for an outsider. The moment was very propitious: the passengers were frantic, some had even swooned, and the emergency exit was right above us in the ceiling.
   Have you ever swum in the Amazon, young man? You haven't? And don't you try it. I assure you it's not worth the thrill. I know, because I've tasted the doubtful pleasure.
   Fooks and I scrambled out through the emergency exit and took our bearings. Underneath us was a river, and in a few seconds the cabin plopped right in the middle of it.
   I bent over the hatch and shouted inside:
   "Welcome to the Amazon, ladies and gentlemen! Pleased to greet you in these wild and inaccessible parts."
   The passengers began to climb out one after another. Seeing there was no immediate danger, they calmed down somewhat and centred their attention on Fooks and me. I saw I had to introduce myself. Since I could not tell them the truth, I had to invent a plausible story.
   "Allow me to introduce myself: Professor of geography Christopher Wrungel, on a scientific expedition in central South America. This is my servant and guide Fooks, a local Indian. I've been here quite a while and am used to the locality. Allow me to consider you my guests."
"Of course," they chorussed. "With pleasure."
   But I could see they did not put much faith in my words: some professor, indeed, wearing nothing but shorts. I felt I had to give them other food for thought, so I asked: "Are you all here?"
They glanced round and one passenger said, "No, there was also a tall gentleman."
   "That's right," another confirmed, "a tall gentleman who went on fire."
   "Is that so?" I asked. "Go down into the cabin, Fooks, and see if he is there and if he needs medical aid."
   Several minutes later Fooks was out, handing me a pinch of ashes-that was all that was left of the tall gentleman, if you please.
   "Oh," I said, "how terribly sad. The tall gentleman seems to have burnt to a cinder. Well, may the Lord God rest his soul... Now, ladies and gentlemen, let us pull the parachute in, it will come in handy yet."
   We each took a shroud line and started pulling. I gave commands: "Heave ho, all together!"   
   Somehow the parachute did not seem to be coming any nearer, though they all did their best. Suddenly I saw them drop theinshroudyines and runlaft.Iso to speak, pressing close together and trembling with fear. As for Fooks, he dived head first into the hatch, then peered out of there and pointed a trembling finger towards the parachute. And our one lady passenger stood on tiptoe, spread out her fingers, waved her arms, as though she was trying to fly up and screamed.
   I looked round, and all but screamed myself. In the parachute I saw a huge anaconda, no less than thirty metres in length. It lay there curled up and looked us over appraisingly, as though trying to decide which was the juciest morsel.
   And I had no weapon except for the pipe in my teeth.
   "Fooks!" I shouted, "give me something heavy!" Fooks handed me some kind of missile, quite alhefty one. "Hustle up some more!" I shouted and aimed me missile. The anaconda seemed to be aiming as well. He opened his cave-like maw, and I threw my missile right into it.

   But what is a small thing like that to an anaconda? He swallowed it without so much as making a face and opened his mouth again. I let fly again, and dashed to the hatch shouting to Fooks: "Give me whatever else you have there!"
   Suddenly I heard a strange hissing noise behind me. I looked round and saw the anaconda swelling. The hissing was coming from its mouth together with a lot of foam. "He'll jump me now," I thought. Instead the anaconda dived into the Amazon and disappeared from view.
   We stood rooted to the spot waiting to see what would happen next. A minute passed, then another. The passengers seemed to be coming to and stirring, when the same lady assumed the same flying up stance and started screaming again.
   And what did we see? A huge shiny balloon rose to the surface, monstrous in shape and very odd in colouring. It kept getting bigger and bigger.
   Now, what can it be, I wondered. It felt creepy. Then I saw that the balloon had a tail which was thrashing frantically and realised it was the poor anaconda whom I had stuffed full of fire-extinguishers. They must have hit against each other in his stomach and started to discharge, pumping the anaconda full of foam. Do you know what the pressure is in a fire-extinguisher? The poor serpent had acquired excessive buoyancy and, beat his tail as he might, could not dive.
   My fear was dispelled at once.
   "Get out, Fooks," I said. "There is no more danger."
   Fooks climbed out and stood admiring the inflated anaconda, while the passengers rushed over to thank me for rescuing them.
   "Nothing to it," I replied modestly. "What is in an anaconda? I've been in tighter spots."
   Well, this incident certainly strengthened my prestige. Moreover, the problem of my attire was solved too. The lady passenger had a needlework basket with her, and I borrowed thread and needle and made myself a jacket out of the parachute cloth. It was beautiful blue cloth, and for buttons I used the screw-bolts from the cabin walls. It was all very nice and shiny, the only thing was you needed a spanner to get in and out of the jacket. But one gets used to small inconveniences. As for Fooks, we found him ready-made overalls in the emergency supply, so he was now decently clad too.
   Then we cut out some sails, put up a mast and set down the Amazon, sustaining ourselves on fish and tortoises. The lady passenger proved to be a passable cook, and life was tolerable, except that our boat was too cranky and slow.
   Still, we crept along east, towards the Atlantic. It took us a month and a half to reach it. The banks of the Amazon teemed with monkeys, lianas, rubber trees, and what not-to last the most curious of travellers a lifetime. But it was a trying experience all the same. The weather was bad, it was the rainy season. It was hot and wet, fogs as thick as jelly, and swarm of mosquitoes. It was a wonder none of us caught yellow fever.

 
To Chapter Twelve To Chapter Fourteen